Big Brother 14 began with twelve new houseguests and four coaches. Love them or hate them.. the four returning players were Dan Gheesling, Britney Haynes, Mike Boogie Malin, and Janelle Pierzina.
The season started with a bang, got a little boring in the middle, and then Dan revived it with some brilliant moves. After 75 days in the Big Brother house, only Dan, Ian Terry, and Danielle Murphree remain.
Who will win Big Brother 14 – Master of the Mist, Awkward Super Fan, or Crazy Teacher Nurse?
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Head of Household – Part One
Right before Dan evicts Shane, Dan asks Ian if he will throw part one of the final HoH his way. Ian tells Dan yes. Ian says, "Dan, here, is including me in his plan. I'm extremely willing to go along with what he says because if he manages to keep me here, I kind of owe him one." Dan goes to Danielle, tells her he convinced Ian to drop… to regain her trust. Dan says, "Ten minutes, he's down… then hopefully you start to see exactly how the hell I'm trying to get us to the end." Right after that, Dan asks Danielle to drop, also.
The endurance competition requires Dan, Ian, and Danielle to sit on swinging hooks. The hooks are slamming them into the wall and dipping them into a pool of water, while it's pouring rain. They're all shivering. Ian drops at 17 minutes. Dan looks at Danielle and says, "It's your call, 'Bama." She whines, "You're asking me to throw my game." Dan challenges her with, "Do you trust me or not?"
Danielle is scared. She's like, Dan, your antics drive me crazy!, and then she drops. Dan wins part one.
Dan smuggly says, "I convinced not one but two people into dumping their chances of winning a half million dollars all for me."
Head of Household – Part Two
Dan has deals with both Danielle and Ian, but, in the diary room, he says he'll stay loyal to Danielle if he wins the final HoH.
Dan tells Danielle, if Ian wins part two of the HoH competition, he's going to congratulate him in front of Danielle. Then, Danielle needs to act crazy (no problem), threatening to turn the jurty against Ian if Ian doesn't take her to the final two. Dan thinks Ian will not want the blood on his hands or want to send a pissed off Danielle to the jury. Dan will then suggest Ian throw the competition to him, allowing him to ultimately be the big bad wolf that eliminates "Danielle."
Danielle says she wants to win part two "so bad," because she threw part one and she wants to control her own destiny, not leave it in Dan's hands. She makes my head hurt.
Part two is a race to put the evicted houseguests in order of their evictions while scaling a "skyscraper." Danielle boasts, "I know the order of the evicted houseguests like the back of my hand." Ian, however, has a better time-saving strategy.
Danielle's time is 7 minutes and 31 seconds. Ian's time is 6 minutes and 4 seconds. Ian wins part two.
After his win, Ian swooshes Dan towards the bedrooms. Dan doesn't wait to congratulate him, of course, because his plan relies on Danielle seeing/hearing Dan's congrats to Ian. Ian gets upset with Dan. He stomps his foot and says, "She was there! I'm gonna kill you." Ian nervously paces around the house. Danielle starts in on Ian. Ian says he doesn't respond well to threats, but he confides in Dan that he is nervous. Dan says to Ian, "If you win and you vote her out, she's going to do that [taint the jury]." Ian says, 'I'm not going to throw it; I'm risk averse. You need to behave yourself though, cause I can't be dealing with that kind of s**t." As Ian walks out of the room, Dan whispers to himself, "Ian, you're going to throw it to me."
Head of Household – Part Three
Dan and Ian have to predict how members of the jury finished sentences during their exit interviews.
Ashley Iocco's favorite moment in the house was when she went on an ice cream date with Frank. – Dan and Ian
Joe Arvin's biggest regret in the game was his ten alliances. – Dan and Ian
Britney's most embarrassing moment in the house was when one of her players told her she bartered cigarrettes for a vote. – Ian
Frank Eudy's most irritating part of being in the house was being on the block every week. – Ian
Jenn Arroyo's most uncomfortable moment in the house was Frank and Willie's backyard brawl. – Ian
Ian wins the final Head of Household.
Ian must choose between two quack packers… Ian evicts Danielle.
Tweet of the night goes to Dani Donato!
If Dan wins, he'll tell Danielle she won & she'll still believe him!! BB#14
Julie asks Danielle, "You put all your eggs in Dan's basket. Why didn't you try and work out a deal with Ian?"
Danielle says, "I didn't want to have too many deals out there, and then have it came back to bite me."
I will never understand why CBS did not show the "real" Danielle. She's such a narcissistic pathological liar, they could have really cashed in on her crazy.
Jury Deliberates
Shane Meaney and Shane Meaney's self-important attitude joins the jury. He's like, "Got blindsided. Yup, the biggest blindside of the season." I disagree, while it was a huge shock to both Shane and Danielle, I think [the evictions of] Boogie, Britney, and Janelle rank higher than Shane, the pretty boy who volunteered to be nominated week after week.
Feelings about Ian:
Joe, Ian made tough decisions, strategic moves, created the quack pack, won HoH and PoV, and sent home his coach.
Britney, Ian worked really hard and made decisions that went against his heart.
Frank, forever bitter, "Ian stabbed me, Mike, and Ashley in the back. He should have stuck with me – he'd still be as far as he is." Yes, Ian, should have stuck with the sinking ship. Gimme a break!
Jenn, Ian's snitching sets her on fire.
Feelings about Dan:
Britney, Dan is so good… she sits in awe.
Ashley, He's very "stategic." If she said the "r," I never heard it.
Jenn says, "Dan's murdering everyone, sending people out in body bags. I like that game, it works for me." Yet, she's all, "snitches get stitches" when it comes to Ian. I don't get her, at all. I liked Jenn better when she only showed up on Thursdays to cast a vote.
Britney reminds everyone that there's no manual on how you have to play Big Brother. There are no rules. Joe retorts, "There is, however, a life manual." Britney wants to know why are Dan's lies are worse than anyone else's lies. <crickets>
Joe ends with, "If Dan and Judas were in the final two, Dan might have my vote. Maybe."
Big Brother 14 jury includes Ashley, Britney, Frank, Joe, Jenn, Shane, and Danielle.
Big Brother 14's non-jury houseguests return… except for Willie Hantz… Kara Monaco, Jodi Rollins, Wil Heuser, Janelle, JoJo Spatafora, and Boogie.
Julie asks Janelle, "What surprised you the most?"
Janelle answers, "Besides all of Danielle's lies, the thing that surprised me the most was Dan's game play. It was just amazing to watch on TV. He had all these people fooled for weeks and they continued to not go after him. If Dan doesn't win Big Brother 14, it's an absolute travesty."
For reasons unknown, Julie feels the need to get Frank's opinion. Will CBS's love affair with Frank ever end? The almighty Frank doesn't think Dan played the game he was best at. Dan played a game that Frank doesn't really respect.
Boogie says Dan played an awesome game, but his shout out goes to Ian… even though Ian is the one responsible for Boogie's eviction. Ian is noticeably touched. Frank could takes lessons from Boogie on how to "let go" and "not be a whiney bitch."
Wil takes issue with everyone who complains about the lies. He says, "Don't hold a grudge against the person who is lying to you, take some responsibility, because you fell for it."
Lame Jury Questions
Ashley to Ian, "Did you make your own decision or do what the Quack Pack wanted you to do?"
Ian says he created the Quack Pack so he COULD take his destiny into his own hands. Ian insists he made all of his own decisions. Dan interjects by saying he disagrees, but Julie cuts him off.
Frank to Dan," We agree that lying and backstabbing are moves in this game that are often times necessary; however, do you feel you crossed the line when you swore on the Bible or your wedding ring? How do you justify doing so?"
Dan says he was forced to play a ruthless game. He's not proud of his moves but being up to his elbows in blood… he had no choice. Eh, he says he's going to confession anyway, so…
Jenn to Ian, "I don't respect snitches in the game. Why should I award you $500,000 when you were playing Boogie, Frank, and me while in the Quack Pack?"
Ian explains that he knew he needed to play for himself when the game was reset. He admits, he took the information from Boogie's camp back to the Quack Pack for his own personal gain.
Joe to Dan, "You said you're up to your elbows in blood yet you've only won one HoH. What blood are you talking about, and what are you trying to take credit for?"
Dan argues that he used people (not competition wins) to get power. Then, he used that power to stab people in the back… misled Danielle and evicted Shane, hosted his own funeral to take down Britney, blindsided Frank, etc.
Britney to Ian, "Why do you think you deserve to win over Dan?"
Ian, once again, says he took his fate into his own hands by working with the Quack Pack instead of the alliance he was given (Boogie's team). Ian also points out that he played a cleaner game than Dan.
Shane to Dan, " Why do you deserve to win over Ian?"
Dan insists that Ian takes too much credit for the Quack Pack. Dan reminds everyone that he, Danielle, Shane, and Britney were already together and they hand-picked Ian (dog suit and all) as their fifth vote. While Dan's talking, Ian repeats "bull, bull, bull, bull."
The best question/answer of the night..
Danielle to Ian, "Did you know that Dan had a final two deal with me and that he was really going to take me instead of you?"
A surprised Ian says, "I was not aware of that fact."
Ian glares at Dan. Dan laughs and laughs and laughs. Ian continues, "I really hope that's not true, because Dan gave me his grandfather's gold necklace as collateral." Now Danielle is shocked.. with her signature "catching flies" mouth. In the moment, Dan tells Danielle he would have kept her because she was his player. Ian is disgusted. He looks at Dan… "really?!?"… over and over and over.
Final Speeches
Ian:
Dan, after hearing what I just heard, I'm fairly disgusted with you. I was going to keep this very nice and no talk you down, but I'm going to have to lay into you a little bit now. To start, I'd like to highlight my competition wins. I've had four HoHs and held the PoV twice. Dan has held a piece. Dan started this game with three lives and expended two of them within the first few weeks. I've had one life the entire time, and I've made it here to the end without losing any. Dan has backstabbed all of you, including almost me. I've played this game with three things – probability, statistics, and a little bit of heart. I've covered my basis when I needed to, made smart decisions for myself, and controlled my own destiny in this game… up into the last HoH.
Dan: (slightly condensed, cause he's incredibly long winded)
When this game was reset, I knew I was in a lot of trouble. There was Frank and Shane… two of the best physical competitors this game has ever seen, Jenn and Joe… very underrated social gamers, Ashley… extremely likable wildcard, Britney… all that and then some, she scared the life out of me, and Danielle… my little warrior. I stood and said to myself "how can I win this game?" I'm not as smart, I'm not as physical. So, all signs point to me playing one type of game, and that's a ruthless game… not because I wanted to, but because I had to. I didn't have to rely on pulling a gold ball out of an arcade machine or winning challenges, I had to do certain despicable things like host my own funeral to make people believe that Danielle and I would never work together again. I played this game 24/7 because I knew my limitations. <more sucking up to the jury> I didn't play this game personal, every move I made was to push me forward. I can only hope and pray you vote for who played this game – not with a photographic memory or with a gold ball out of an arcade machine – but with the tools they had. <more sucking up to the jury> I hope you guys aren't too disgusted with me.
Votes to Win
Ashley giggles like an idiot. Britney says that both Dan and Ian deserve to be in the end and "quack, quack." Frank votes for who "made the best decisions." Joe and Jenn… just blah. Dan awkwardly brings up Jenn's record sales. Shane … "the things I want to say, Dan" … get over yourself, Shane. Danielle says she's going to keep her word to the end, and that's the only reason she's voting the way she is.
Danielle votes for Dan.
Shane, Jenn, Joe, Frank, Britney, and Ashley vote for Ian.
By a vote of 6 to 1… Ian is the winner of Big Brother 14… and $500,000!
"This is easiest the best moment in my entire life!," says Ian.
Dan wins the second place prize of $50,000. Well deserved, in my opinion. I would have rather seen Dan win the jury votes, solely based on the incredible moves he made, but the jury totally voted feelings over game this season. That said, I'm still very happy for Ian.
Interestingly, Dan won season 10 by a vote of 7 to 0. And, in season 14, he almost lost by an unanimous vote. I think Dan would have won against Danielle. Worth mentioning, Ian would have been toast in week one, if Boogie hadn't won the coaches' challenge and granted him immunity. Also, Ian was the target when he won the gold veto, when Dan was HoH/double eviction, and at final four.
Frank wins America's Choice… and $25,000. Seriously?!? To be completely honest, this disgusts me. I keep telling myself that Dan and Ian were the top two votes, and Frank "won" because he was third. Or, it's all a lie, and he's just the producer's pet till the end.
Good news: CBS annouced yesterday that Big Brother 15 is a sure thing! Bad news: Next summer is 9 months away!
WHO WERE YOU ROOTING FOR – DAN OR IAN? YOUR THOUGHTS ON THE SEASON AS A WHOLE?
Photo credit: CBS