Well Thanksgiving came, we ate everything we could, and now it's time to burn off the calories with a little shopping. How many calories does typing burn?
Below is our list of the best reality TV products you should be purchasing right now. I mean you hate someone on your Christmas list enough to gift them a Kim Zolciak Wig, right?
If only the mythical She by Sheree actually existed, I would absolutely be buying that if they gave it away for free!
CLICK CONTINUE READING FOR OUR LIST:
[Photo Credit: Dominic Chan/WENN.com]
20: SKINNYGIRL
It's the original Housewife product courtesy of miniscule mogul Bethenny Frankel. Bethenny has expanded her Skinnygirl empire to include shapewear, snackbars, books, booze galore, and Lord only knows what else.
There's still some diehards out there that love the original sauce, so go ahead give ol' Bethenny a little love and pass along the gift of low-cal, little chance of intoxication liquor. It's a great gift for the person you don't really want to hang out with. Once you've housed the bottle and don't feel a drop drunk, you can bail and go out with your real friends for some legit cocktails. Remember: never drink and drive.
19: ALEXIS COUTURE:
It's perfect to wear to church on Christmas… if you want your pastor to have a coronary. The boobilicious Jesus-wants-me-to-love-myself inspired line by Real Housewives of Orange County star Alexis Bellino features all kinds of polyester you never wanted. Just remember: couture means, like, rich. I think Alexis meant to title her line Hoe-ture, because one's options include unaffordably priced boob exposing everything and crotch skimming almost everything. For the wannabe rich of California, I suppose!
[Photo Credit: perfectanbikini.com]
18: JWOWW PERFECT TAN BIKINIS:
Some of you are lucky enough to spend the Holidays in the tropics. JWoww's line of Perfect Tan Bikini's makes tan lines a thing of the past. But yeah, skin cancer is still a thing of the future. SO don't tan too much!
17: ON DISPLAY!
For the people on your Christmas list that absolutely, like not at all, do not value their eardrums – Melissa Gorga's autotuned warbling is the perfect thing to sneak onto their iPod in a secretly uploaded Christmas Playlist.
[Photo Credit: Twitter]
16: SNOOKI SLIPPERS:
Sure they look comfy. If your version of comfy is tacky as hell! If someone on your Christmas list happens to be a Real Housewife of New Jersey and thinks leopard print faux-sneakers are the height of couture, you can't go wrong with slippers by Snooki.
[Photo Credit: Twitter]
15: Jail Mail
Make some poor inmate's Christmas complete by writing them a letter with love. Renee Graziano's good little peeps will make sure to keep your return address secret. But don't get any Mob Wives aspirations of your own and try to snag yourself a hubby out of the deal!
[Photo Credit: Carrie Devorah/WENN.com]
14: CLASS WITH THE COUNTESS:
Wanna know how to snare a philandering count? What about how to sing songs about being chic while lolling around on a chaise lounge with Kelly "Beans Of Truth" Bensimon?
LuAnn de Lesseps can help a girl out. Her advice book teaches all us wannabe Countesses how to impress with faux elitism and live in a delusional world. I think this one is a great one for the secret santa swap – watch how many times it gets passed around before some poor sop gets stuck with it. Plus, it's easily found in bargain bins.
[Photo Credit: evelynlozada.com]
11: E BY EVELYNCOSEMETICS:
E by Evelyn Lozada will transform your face by the woman who can't even get Iyanla to transform her life. For the ladies out there hoping to snare an Ocho of their own, Evelyn Lozada's colors by the pound makeup will make you sparkle and shine! Just don't wear them on your weddding day – bad luck!
[Photo Credit: Twitter]
10. FARRAH ABRAHAM's "ON MY OWN" (and accompanying tomato sauce).
Now that Teen Mom is a thing of the past and MTV has given her the boot, Farrah Abraham is scrambling to make a buck. The former reality star launched a single or horrors and is now in the process of developing her own tomato sauce line. Good god. In addition, the unreprentend famewhore has just published a book. I guess this is the perfect gift pacakge for that teenager in your life that has been annoying the hell out of you.
WARNING: THIS COULD BE YOU!!!!! DRINK AT YOUR OWN RISK! [Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]
11. RAMONA PINOT GRIGIO
If you really really really want to unleash the crazy in that friend of your's who's like way, way too uptight why not pass along a bottle of Ramona Singer's prized possession. That is if she hasn't drank it all so the stores are completely barren of supplies… Turtle Time for Christmas, anyone?
[Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]
9. HAIR TINSEL:
Remember when Adrienne Maloof put Christmas tree garlands in her hair and called it a fashion statement? Remember that? Remember the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills star thought that was a good way to advertise for her hotel The Palms? For the girl who has everything… or for the girl who wants to look like a Vegas Hooker. Available at The Palms!
8. PEARLBRITE:
Yeah, so… all I want for Chrstmas is for a person who's totally not a dentist and can't even pronounce the word "ingredients" to whiten my teeth with a multi-level marketing product. For the many? few? none? Teresa Giudice fans on your gift list, how about PearlBrite Teeth Whitening Solutions. I heard Juicy makes housecalls… if you're hot. Also good for those looking for a new business venture following bankruptcy!
[Credit: Facebook]
7. PERSONAL TRAINING BY TAMRA BARNEY:
Wanna be, like, the hottest housewife in your neighborhood? Wanna give someone the gift of a life of egg white omelets and spinclasses? Tamra Barney's fitness studio C.U.T Fitness opens Dec 15th. Just in time to remind the person you love that for 10 years running their New Year's resolution has been to get in shape.
[Photo Credit: bedroomkandi.com]
6. BEDROOM KANDI:
Aaaahhh… pleasure seekers, have we got a gift for you! Kandi Burruss provides the perfect stocking stuffer for your unlucky in love Bachelor-watcher who dreams of the day when a hot, handsome stud (like RiDICKulous!) will ride them off into the sunset. Until then, they can console their lady parts with a little party-of-one fun.
[Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]
5. BLK WATER:
For the adventure seeker on your gift list, how about a little sewage in a bottle. I've tried it, and yeah – I won't be again.
[Photo Credit: TNYF WENN.com]
4. SKWEEZE COUTURE (or some lovely delicacies from Jill's Personal Closet!):
Any shapewear addicts on your list? For the person you're not sure if you love who just can't stop hitting the Christmas cookies – how about a little Skweeze Couture? From Jill Zarin with love. And if you're a huge Jill fan you can always purchase some of her fashionables direct from her closet. All proceeds go to the Free Bawby Fund.
[Photo Credit: Daniel Deme/WENN.com]
3. QUICKTRIM:
Give the gift of Kim Kardashian. Perfect for the wannabe famewhore in your life who updates Facebook every 3 seconds to spam your thread with annoying photos and posts about what she's buying at Target. Also perfect for the person you just can't stand (SIL, anyone?) As an added bonus throw in some Kardashian Kollection. Hell, it's always on sale. Disclaimer: extra-large super paded, inflata butt sold separately.
[Photo Credit: Twitter]
2. SONJA IN THE CITY TOASTER OVEN:
Sonja Morgan has a taste for toaster oven cooking, but unfortunately the long-fraught toaster oven will never seem to be real. Console yourself in the meantime by whipping up some of the Real Housewives of New York star's recipes. I'm totally tying her toaster oven potato chips – albeit in my own Breville. Sorry, S – I can't by a three-tiered toaster oven (with crumbtray) proffered by a nude male torso if it doesn't actually exist. I blame that damn box for causing problems. If only that had worked out…
[Photo: Twitter]
1. WIGS BY KIM ZOLCIAK:
Kim Zolciak keeps on insisting she has a wig line in the works. Really, Kim, really? Is that like you were never engaged to a married man? Anyway the elusive wig line hasn't arrived yet – and we got a scoop that it may never become reality. But hey, maybe Kim will sell off some of her used friends on Ebay and you can surprise your poor loved one a Zolciak classic. Cleaned lovingly by Sweetie with olive oil and then dried in a microwave. Be warned – that can cause house fires!
Don't let your wig be tardy for the party!
[Photo Credit: BravoTV.com]
Oh, and if you want to know what reality star's product we actually would buy, it's Havana Elsa. What's a better way to wake up than crazy in a cup?
[Main Photo Credit: WENN.com]
TELL US – WHICH OF THESE GIFTS WILL YOU BE GIVING?
