Oh Kim D… it's no secret that I love your scheming, drama-starting ways. And I especially admire the way you willingly play the villain – and you do it well!
Since Bravo is afraid to give Kim D her own Real Housewives of New Jersey blog she's started one of her own. In Kim D's latest uncensored behind-the-scenes missive she spills the dirt on why Teresa Giudice was congregating with Penny and Jan. And shares her feelings on 'Friends of the Housewives' upstart Jennifer Dalton.
"After this episode, you will clearly see that I have obviously been established as 'the villain' of the season," Kim hints. "I’ll own it proudly! After all, things do just fall into my lap! [;)] " Anything for fame right, Kimmie BePosched?
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On Why Teresa Was Meeting With Jan and Penny:
"To address how I know Jan: a very dear friend of mine who has known her for years introduced us. Jan owns a salon called Teeze, which has headed up hair and makeup for my models at a recent Posche fashion show. Teresa had just started marketing her Milania Hair Care products and was looking for salons in the area to start carrying the line. My friend and I both felt that Teeze would be a great fit."
"As for Penny, she is also a salon owner and hairdresser whom I have known for years. She and Jan are friendly as they run in similar circles. The initial purpose of the meeting was for Teresa to pitch the Milania line to Jan and Penny and also to personally invite them to her launch party. Teresa started reminiscing with Jan when we sat down at the table to catch up on old times. That is when Jan admitted that Melissa [Gorga] was no longer her friend."
On Jan, Melissa, and Their Dissolute Friendship:
"From what Jan had told me in the past, she was upset with Melissa for not acknowledging or supporting her new business venture (Teeze), and also for ultimately casting her aside as a friend. Bottom line: Jan was hurt. At the time, I was more than 'not too fond' of Melissa for reasons that have at this point been made very clear. As I previously stated, we are in a good place now. However, this was a girls night out. What do girls typically do on a night out? Gossip. Jan took the conversation to a place none of us expected it to go. We sat and listened. It was not my story.
On Jennifer Stirring The Pot:
"Onto the lunch with Melissa and the woman I like to refer to in the rest of my blogs as 'the realtor'. Where do I begin? Should I start with the Warpaint collection of MAC cosmetics she was showcasing, or the 'macaroni and cheeth' that was apparently so delicious she barely came up for air?! And I should state that Montville is a beautiful and very affluent town. Most people would kill to live there. Not sure why the realtor would tell Melissa she should be living anywhere else."
"As far as the 'cheating on your huthband' goes…(is it just me or does she sound like she has marbles in her mouth when she speaks?) maybe at the time you could say I did have it out for Melissa because of what she did with regards to my business. However, I would never look to break up a marriage. This story came out and I sat back and listened. As I said it was not MY story."
"Teresa however, did not just sit back and listen. She was uncomfortable with the discussion and what you do not see is that she actually got up from the table. She did not want any part of it PERIOD."
"I do have to ask: What else would this realtor do to get a listing? And wait, WHO is the 'sh*tstarter'?? Think someone needs to take a good, long look in the mirror. She is FAR from innocent and that’s all I’ll say about that for the moment…"
On The "Chance" Meeting With Melissa & Joe:
Kim claims the bar/restaurant is popular and often packed. She insists it was a mere coincidence that RHONJ cast was there with camera crews in tow. We so do not believe you!
"When I am called over to the table, you see Jacqueline [Laurita] holding her nose. She is a jokester and was only kidding. We are very close and she likes to bust on me. She threw the napkin so that Melissa and I would stop arguing. And by the way, it was very refreshing to hear how much Richie loves me!"
"In reference to the 'coincidences', they are not coincidental. I said it on the reunion and I will say it again: The circumstances were simply convenient. Anyone in my life can tell you that I know A LOT of people. People do talk and are always telling me things. Do I believe everything I hear? No, absolutely not, but that doesn’t always stop information from getting out. I was not looking for 'a pass.'”
"Did not ask for one, did not want one. Kathy asks why I didn’t shut the conversation down at Bellissimo’s when it turned ugly. Maybe that would have been the right thing to do. However, as most of you do know by now I have a devilish side in me and I cannot always help that! I can say that going forward I will try my hardest and work on it! [;)]"
"What you do not see when Joe asks me if I think Melissa cheated on him is that I actually say: 'No, I don’t think she cheated.' I will repeat, I would never wish to break up a marriage. Like Melissa says, they are “un-f*ckin-breakable” and I do firmly believe that."
Kim also comments on Teresa and Jacqueline who she compares to an "ex-married couple" instead of former friends. "I think everyone will be pleasantly surprised as to what the season has in store for their relationship," she promises.
So that's the dirty details straight from the horses mouth!
[Photo Credit: Dave Kotinsky/Getty Images]
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