You may want to grab a tooth brush and a pair of bullsh-t wading boots before you read Brandi Glanville‘s blog. Brandi’s take on the latest episode of Real Housewives of Beverly Hills gave us sugary sweet praises of Kim Richards and Yolanda Foster and hypocritical insults directed at Lisa Rinna.
About the scavenger hunt, Brandi gushed, “Not just any scavenger hunt, but a Beverly Hills scavenger hunt on Rodeo Drive. Well, hey, it’s The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, so why not? I personally thought it was a welcome change and a chance to have some fun and share it with the fans. Despite Yo’s health, she is a really positive, uplifting spirit, and I am thankful she brings fun to our group.” Ha. At least until someone orders a chocolate milkshake.
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Brandi continued, “Yo hired experts to make sure we all had a great time and made thoughtful shirts to make everyone feel special. A brilliant move by Yo was having the teams chosen by the company… so no high school clique nonsense.” Does Brandi really believe those teams were drafted by a neutral party? Yolanda with Lisa Vanderpump? Kim with Eileen Davidson? Brandi with Kyle Richards? Way too many coincidences for me to believe no “clique nonsense” was going on behind the scenes.
“Firstly, I think Yo’s idea was great and a success for those who participated wholeheartedly,” said Brandi. “I give a pass to Kim, who was still a trooper but was still experiencing some knee and hernia pain. Protecting your knees is serious if you have joint issues, and she was smart to pace herself as tendon injuries can last for months. The others? Well, you saw what I saw. Sadly, I saw a lot of negativity, complaining, petty, unnecessary jabs, and criticizing their own teammates for physical issues they can’t control. Quotes from one of our ladies: ‘I hate clues, I hate the game, I hate the whole thing.’ She followed this by shooting the bird at Yo. Nice.”
“On the other hand I had fun; I love the sun, games, clues, and getting outside. I’d love to participate in other games or lighthearted competitions on RHOBH,” said Brandi. “I’d like to participate in a Brandi-free RHOBH,” said me. I hope I win. Also? If anyone other than Yolanda or Kim had organized the scavenger hunt, Brandi wouldn’t have been as gung ho.
Brandi continued her sugary sweet review of all things Yolanda. “The prize for participating in the fun or awful day, depending on which Housewife we’re talking about, was a paid luxury trip to Amsterdam! Some of us had also accepted an invitation to David Foster‘s charity event in Calgary. A trip to see Yo’s homeland with Yo is and was an amazing gift. Some people say, ‘Planes and yachts are not important,’ but they don’t own planes or yachts, so we kinda know, to them, they are very important. Me? I am thankful for the Fosters’ generosity but would be just as happy riding old bicycles down a dirt road with a healthy strong Yo.” Just reading Brandi’s blog has given me a cavity.
Sure, now that I need to call my dentist, Brandi moved on to the drama. “On the dramatic side, someone poked the wrong bear. We saw Kim slowly learning that someone has had one-on-one talks about her private life with everyone on RHOBH – everyone, that is, but Kim herself. To me, announcing you’re ‘a nice person’ isn’t that same as actually being a nice person.” Doesn’t Brandi remember Lisa talking TO KIM at Eileen‘s house? Ah, yes, that’s right. Brandi wasn’t invited back to Eileen’s house. Because, Brandi.
The rest of Brandi‘s blog has been brought to you by the letters D and H and the number 3. And one Huh?!?
Delusional Hypocritical statement 1 from Brandi: “Yep, one new member of our little group is hell-bent on intruding, casting strong labels, making insanely irresponsible assumptions and stating them as facts: on RHOBH, the Internet, to the media, and on Bravo’s WWHL.“
Like fishy vaginas and $9.95 bankruptcy reports?
Delusional Hypocritical quote 2 from Brandi: “Calmly butting into a stranger’s life with such a strong agenda and absolutely zero knowledge of any details of that life after only a few social functions is a new level of crossing boundaries.“
Delusional Hypocritical quote 3 from Brandi: “Then, tonight, acting all wide-eyed, innocent, and confused at the results after doing so? To quote the instigator, ‘Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs.’ On another note, or maybe the same note (boundaries), it’s probably not a good idea to announce your spouse’s previous alcoholism before he does it himself. But maybe he was OK with that, and I’m wrong. Well, in any case, sincere congrats on three years of sobriety.“
Brandi preaching on boundaries. HaHa. Classic.
This is… just… huh?!? “Kim Richards was a movie star when most of us were home watching her movies on TV after school and doing our homework. She’s been in this town a long time, knows everyone, worked since she was born, raised four children, survived Hollywood, sobriety, family, divorces, deaths, has more on her plate than all of us, and throughout it all, cares for her terminally ill ex-husband with patience and grace,” campaigned Brandi. Is Kim running for office? “Sometimes you poke the wrong bear; that is all I am saying. Good luck with that.”
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