O, Season 9 of Flipping Out, how I’ve patiently awaited your long overdue arrival! (And we get a 2-night premiere to boot! YES!) It’s been nearly a year since we last saw Jeff Lewis and the gang, and now that they’re back, all is right with the world again. Last seen, Jeff was mediating between longtime housekeeper/mother figure/future nanny Zoila Chavez and boyfriend/future baby daddy Gage Edward. Zoila either got the bad edit last season, or she was extra grumpy about folding Jeff’s undershorts into perfect hexagons. Whatever the case, she took out her rage on Gage, who dealt with her passive aggressive insults all season long. Until Jeff negotiated a fragile peace between them during the season 8 finale.
In the time between then and now, Gage and Jeff have announced they are expecting a baby girl via surrogacy. Wheeeeeeeeeee! (Please let them decorate the baby room on camera, please let them decorate the baby room on camera – if I chant this enough times, will it work!!?!?) But before all of this good news unfolds, let’s check in with what’s transpired since the crew departed once and for all from their beloved Gramercy. Answer: Lots.
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For starters, Jeff and Gage have moved to the suburbs! Valley Vista is their new abode, well…half an abode. It’s a house flip they’re living through, demoing and gutting the house half at a time while they squat in the other half – a situation which Jeff doesn’t mind. He grew up in construction zones with his father, who also flipped occasionally, and who wisely reminded him that everything – everything – is just temporary.
Gage must be repeating this mantra to himself, or as Jenni Pulos claims: Gage has surrendered. The white flag has flown. He accepts he can never change Jeff Lewis, so he must learn to live with him. There’s no kitchen in Valley Vista, the laundry room is…kinda outside? But they’re making do with plastic forks and Lean Cuisines.
#ChannaGate rears its head! It’s been over 6 months since Jeff was fired from Living Spaces, who took issue with Jeff’s representation of their super tacky furniture and decor on last season’s footage. Jeff had called out his co-designer, Channa, on camera for sabotaging his ass on a shoot. Which she did. Since then, Jeff and Jenni were called into the LS offices to get ripped new bung-holes, then promptly fired. Jeff maintains that he didn’t deserve the firing, he didn’t do anything wrong. (And he brought that company into the current century, design wise, as far as I could see.)
Jeff and Gage consult their lawyer about filing a suit against LS, who refused to pay Jeff for the third year of his contract. Jeff’s reputation has also been tarnished. The income they were counting on has disappeared, but do they really want to get into litigation over this? No, probably not. Jeff is mad, but not stupid.
Last year, Jeff had moved everyone into his old Hollywood Hills house, and since then it’s been totally gutted. Ready to completely redesign/rebuild this, Jeff has enlisted an architect. He’s going for a $6-7 million dollar sale price and according to the architects renderings, this place is going to be SWEET! Gage looks itchy and sweaty as the architect reviews the many splendored options and chuckles that “it’s only money!” Not to Gage, it isn’t.
Jeff’s crew this year includes: Jenni, Vanina Alfaro (who we’re told is a little burned out), Megan Weaver, Matt (no longer silent!), Gage, and new girl Ashlyn (Matt’s former coworker). The staff have a new working setup in the living room, squished together closer than ever before, as if that was possible. No personal space means no professional/personal boundaries (the Jeff Lewis code), so Gage and he begin to discuss the viability of their individual embryos! Jeff’s girl embryo will be used first because he’s just a “touch” older…ahem.
Later on, the crew silently cringes as Jeff calmly tries to reason with an unreasonable client (Carol – do we know her?) on the phone. He’s keeping his inside voice in check – which is strangely scarier than his ragey voice – as he rips into Carol for her nastiness and unprofessionalism. Then he quits on the spot, and unheard of notion for Jeff, according to Jenni. Things have to get baaaaaaaad before Jeff quits, she says. But Gage concurs that this Carole client is #THEWORST. So, it’s ovah!
In the car, Jenni encourages Jeff to use his vehicle’s massage function. She’s tryin’! They make their rounds to client projects, which include everything from small, annoying jobs, to full on remodels. Jeff has had to take on lots of work since losing both his Living Spaces gig and Brian Austin Green/Megan Fox project. One deal he’s hoping to secure is the $700k+ Newport Beach renovation of potential new clients: Marty and Mary. The 4,200 square foot, nearly $4 million home will need a total remodel, and Jeff hopes to get the gig. His tactic: be less pushy and obnoxious that he was in his first interview with them, in which they hated him!
Back at Hollywood, Jeff stares at the latest architectural renderings, which are troubling him. He doesn’t want this project to balloon out of control. But there must be glass! There must be marble! Jason, the architect, encourages Jeff to stick to his plan. But he obviously doesn’t know who Jeff is; Jeff sticks to no man’s plan! Jason is not the most intuitive bloke, nor is he…normal!? After some weird deadpan speech about what qualifications he’s seeking in a husband, Jenni inches away from him Jason bit, a frightened smile plastered to her face.
Once back at Valley Vista, Jeff starts to wig out over his missing thermostat, his missing – well, everything. Living in a flip isn’t something he’s done since 2004 and, as Jenni says, he swore he’d never do it again. Yet, here he is! The rest of the staff is not happy either. Living in this reno is putting Jeff’s acute OCD on BLAST. Not a good thing.
Out to dinner with potential clients, Marty and Mary, Jeff and Jenni do their best to woo them with photos of gorgeous design, and table giggles. Jeff loves these would-be clients, as they are as unfiltered as Jeff. Mary has been married 3 times prior to Marty, and Marty snorts that they met on Match.com because he’s got “kind of” a sense of humor and is a professor. They’re keeping it real at dinner, but will they turn into client-zillas down the road? It’s anyone’s guess.
More arguing in the car later (it’s like old times – forever!) followed by client visits, this time to longtime friend Chaz Dean. Chaz has like a gazillion (okay, a dozen) properties under contract with Jeff Lewis Design, so the project management of this shiznit is a big job. (Formerly) Silent Matt to the rescue! Matt’s haircut hasn’t improved, but his communication has. He is mini-Gage, super detail oriented, and doesn’t mind keeping Jeff on task when he wanders off on a tangent. Go MATT! Jeff wants to clone him. But not Zoila, and never Gage.
Good news: Marty and Mary have hired Jeff! They’re excited to move forward with the project, and Jeff is excited to have the money coming back in again. He promises his staff will be at their beck and call – well, all but Vanina, who he jokes is a flake. <side eye> Vanina laughs the jab off, but is she laughing on the inside? Something tell me: OH HELL NO.
At the end of the workday, all is as it should be: Zoila takes drink orders on a pad of paper, mixing up martinis and margaritas in plastic cups instead of stemware. Jeff knows that their janky digs are troubling, but he’s confident that nothing is forever. Everything he once had, he’ll get back again – and more. Just like his father told him.
TELL US: ARE YOU EXCITED FOR SEASON 9? IS JEFF IN A SLUMP, OR JUST IN A TEMPORARY DIP?
Photo Credit: Bravo
