Kristen Doute, eternally single former SURver on Vanderpump Rules has another project in the works! Since being fired from Lisa Vanderpump’s sexy, unique retirement home Kristen has managed to keep her spot on Pump Rules. She hasn’t done it by emoting words of wisdom. She hasn’t done it by her exceptional friendship skills. And she hasn’t don’t it by maintaining a compelling storyline. Basically Kristen has kept her job by acting like that one adult in your life you speak to like a toddler because they are always about 2 minutes away from a massive freak out. Also, this is reality television, so it works.
Kristen has dabbled in several money-making ventures since leaving SUR. She participated in selling whine wine with Katie Maloney and Stassi Schroeder. Kristen also has her own line of clothes. But what she’s most known for is her lack of impulse control. What she calls “crazy”. Now Kristen is parlaying her crazy into the world of literature. That’s right folks, Kristen is writing a self-help book.
Kristen is adding her name to the list of potential bestselling authors! It isn’t all that outlandish. Stassi penned a rather successful piece which wound up making her some cash. While Stassi stuck with the topic she is most familiar with, being unapologetically basic, Kristen wants to tackle a subject close to her heart. Being “crazy”.
According to People, Kristen has teamed up with How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days author Michele Alexander. Now they are creating “the ultimate guide to owning your ‘crazy’ and never giving up on love.” I don’t know if Kristen’s dating history is more about her not giving up on love, or love just completely giving up on her. Speaking as a single person, do I really want dating advice from someone who banged Jax Taylor while her boyfriend was in the other room? And then lied about it. For months.
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Kristen shared some details. “Women get used to being called crazy whenever we’re emotional.” Right. But “crazy” might be a valid term if someone, I don’t know, flies a strange woman in from another state to confront an ex-boyfriend who has happily moved on in another relationship.
Kristen continued, “People might call this a self-help book, but I see it as a self-empowerment book. My goal is to create an army of boss bitches who own being ‘crazy’ and fight for the respect we deserve.” Hi, 1945 called and said they don’t want the female gender setting themselves back 80 years by implying they are emotionally unstable. With all due respect, this is someone who socked poor 96 pound James Kennedy in the face at a wedding. I’m not sure any of Kristen’s mistakes in life should be used as guidelines unless it’s on what NOT to do.
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Kristen also shared, “I want to give every reader the tools to avoid or get out of unhealthy situations and find real love,” she added. Okay girl, but you first. Kristen then unleashed more crazy specifics. “Sometimes that requires deep self-reflection, but sometimes you just need to put on your detective’s hat and hack a man’s email account.” Um, no. How about not cheating on your boyfriends so much you are literally suspicious of everyone?
In He’s Making You Crazy, Kristen will “unpack the ups and downs of her dating history with anecdotes about trapping boyfriends in lies, tongue-in-cheek tips to gather all your crush’s security question answers on the first date.” Oh fun. So we will be taught the ways of subterfuge and trickery to thrust upon a burgeoning relationship.
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The agent who brokered the deal for the book said, “It’s been my great pleasure to help Kristen seize the narrative and tell her story her way. There is so much more to her than you’ve seen on TV, and I know anyone who’s been called ‘crazy’ a time or two will enjoy following her on the long and winding road to real self-love.” While I understand the concept, it seems this narrative would be more beneficial coming from someone who didn’t have a flower bed for lunch on a wine tour. Hey, maybe next we’ll get a book from Katie on how to have a successful marriage!
Unfortunately the book won’t be out before the holidays. It is expected to be published in hardcover and eBook in summer 2020. I can’t wait.
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TELL US- WILL YOU BUY KRISTEN’S BOOK? SHOULD SHE GIVE RELATIONSHIP ADVICE? WILL HER BOOK BE SUCCESSFUL?
[Photo Credit: Charles Sykes/Bravo]
