Welcome to the Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Season 4, Episode 15 recap. In this week’s episode, “Swimming with the Fishes,” the ladies argue their way through a day cruise on a yacht, dinner at Bermuda’s finest sushi house, and a visit to the oldest bar on the island. Meredith turns the blame back onto Monica for the rumors about Angie being in the Greek Mafia, and a drunken Whitney accuses Heather of “[exploiting] my vagina in your book!” Here are the highlights of RHOSLC Season 4, Episode 15.
Heather respects her daughters’ privacy
The morning after Monica’s birthday, Heather texts Monica and invites her for a walk. Heather apologizes for telling Monica to STFU at dinner the night before. Heather was irritated that Monica kept asking about her oldest daughter’s sex life. Because she’s a good mom, Heather refuses to talk about her daughters’ personal business – not because she’s ashamed to talk about sex but because it’s PRIVATE.
Though Monica doesn’t quite grasp the concept of “privacy,” she finally accepts that “certain topics aren’t up for discussion.” She apologizes for pushing, and they hug it out.
More squabbling at sea
Today’s activity/fighting location is a catamaran, which Lisa says she’s arranged for them. When somebody asks what makes it a “catamaran,” Lisa explains it means “a super sick, strong boat.” Eye-roll. No, it’s not, dummy. According to my friend Google, a catamaran is “a watercraft with two parallel hulls of equal size.”
“The last time I was on a boat with these ladies, my shoes went overboard,” Angie says in a production interview. “But with all this tension today, I wouldn’t be surprised if someone doesn’t end up sleeping with the fishes, ’cause that’s how the Mafia does it, right?” At least she can have a sense of humor about the ridiculous rumors.
Once they’re underway, Heather comes and sits next to Meredith. “Let me just give it to you straight,” Heather tells her. “We have a real friendship, and I, too, was blindsided last night.”
Meredith vehemently denies creating a fake account and sending DMs to Monica. “There’s a lot of elements here that aren’t adding up,” Meredith says. She says she “told a story about the Mafia,” and Monica “planted that.”
Meredith thinks that maybe Monica’s the one spreading the rumors since she seemed to have a lot of “dirt and rumors” about Angie. The DMs that Meredith received with all the accusations against Angie were all stuff that Monica had been talking about on the plane coming back from Palm Springs. That’s why she called Monica when she got the DMs. Heather doesn’t know who to believe.
Meredith goes to the source
Heather encourages Meredith to go talk to Monica, who’s annoyed about being distracted from her taco lunch. Meredith confesses that everything she knows about Angie is what Monica told her. Monica holds tight to the theory that Meredith was the one to tell her about the rumors. I’m thinking the truth lies somewhere in the middle, as it usually does.
At this point, Lisa inserts herself into the conversation and starts yelling, “Meredith, you’re lying. Stop lying and don’t do this to Monica … Just admit you f*cked up, and we can all move on.”
Meredith continues to insist that she’s not the one bringing up the rumors. Lisa believes Monica because she sees “a pattern with Meredith.” Lisa pronounces it “patterin.” Jeez Louise. do they not have schools in Utah?
Finally, Meredith decides not to “pour my energy into these morons accusing me of something I didn’t do.”
“Clearly, we’re not getting anywhere,” Lisa announces. “We’re on a beautiful catamaran. Let’s go have fun!” Seriously!
When she cools down, Meredith approaches Angie and says the reason she called Monica about the DMs was because they contained things Monica had already told her. “I said, ‘Did you get a DM?’ That was it.” Meredith assures Angie that she’s not out to get her.
Meredith tells the other ladies, “Angie and I spoke, and the final conclusion is … she’s taking out a hit on me.” This made me LOL. She waits a beat and admits, “I’m kidding.”
Sex-shaming or just TMI?
On the van going to dinner, Whitney tells Heather how much she’s enjoyed sleeping by herself since she’s been in Bermuda. Heather says, “Babe, you’re dissing J-dog. Come on now. I love Justin.”
Whitney’s obviously been overserved because next she begins going into detail about how good her husband is at oral sex. Okay … TMI.
“I will never recover,” Heather jokes. “Whitney Rose, [you] know my boundaries. Please respect them. Thank you.”
But Whitney feels like Heather’s “shaming” her rather than “confirming.” Ugh, here we go. I’ll be honest, I also have zero desire to hear anything about my friends’ sex lives, other than in the most general terms. It’s none of my business, and my husband would literally die if he knew I was sharing private information with my acquaintances. Maybe I’m old school, but I think what happens between two consenting partners should stay between those two. It’s a trust issue. I’m with Heather on this.
Things get weird at the Swizzle Inn
Lisa asks if anyone’s read Heather’s book, but Heather laughs, “It doesn’t matter who reads it. It matters who buys it.” Good point.
“I have read your book,” Whitney tells Heather. “And last night, you were so uncomfortable to talk about sex with [Monica] … You told her to STFU, but you openly write about my sexuality in your book.”
Shocked, Heather says the story about Whitney had nothing to do with her sexuality. She wrote about meeting Whitney when she hired Heather to take pictures for a boudoir book for her husband.
“I just think it’s hypocritical that you won’t talk about your own sex life,” Whitney says, “but you’ll write about mine.”
That’s just stupid. Whitney’s obviously had too much to drink and sees an opportunity to grab some camera time. Whitney’s trying too hard. Go home, Whitney, you’re drunk.
But Heather’s not having it. She gets up and leaves, as Whitney and a cameraman chase her across the parking lot. Whitney keeps saying, “This is my ‘fillings,’ Heather. It’s not fair that you ‘sex-shame’ Monica, and [then] exploit my sexuality in your book.” She wants to have a conversation.
“I don’t want to have a conversation with you,” Heather responds. “You’re drunk and you’re crazy. Get away from me.”
“You exploited my vagina in your book,” Whitney shrieks.
Meanwhile, a crew member follows Heather across the road and tries to calm her. Heather says she just needs a minute to “have a think.”
We’ll wrap all this weirdness up in two weeks, on the RHOSLC Season 4 finale.
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Season 4 finale airs January 2 at 8/7c on Bravo.
TELL US – WHO DO YOU BELIEVE: MEREDITH OR MONICA? DO YOU THINK HEATHER’S BEING A HYPOCRITE?
