Mount Rushmore National Memorial is important for several reasons. The rock formations honor some of our most renowned American leaders and feature four presidents on the side of the mountain: George Washington, Thomas Jefferson, Theodore Roosevelt, and Abraham Lincoln. The men represent the first 150 years of American history. The public work of art symbolizes the ideals of freedom, democracy, and patriotism.
So naturally, when I had a moment to stop and think of whose face would grace my Bravo Mount Rushmore, I had some ideas. Just like the historical monument, Bravo’s best of the best need a place to rest their laurels. The Greek gods have Mount Olympus, and our beloved presidents already have South Dakota. So it is only fitting for some of the network’s most loved to be given a fitting tribute. I’d want the sanctuary to be an inspiration to visitors from all over as they look up and openly quote the stars on the wall.
Reza Farahan – Shahs of Sunset
Fans have missed Shahs of Sunset ever since the show went off the air in 2021. The group were documented trying to juggle their active social lives in Beverly Hills while balancing the demands of their families and traditions. None told a better story than Reza “Joon” Farahan. The star of the show is quick-witted and known for his “tell it like it is” attitude. It also helped that he had a fabulous Persian style that embraced gold and his thick mustache. But I don’t envy the sculptor who will have to chisel that perfect lip blanket.
Along with being the catalyst to most drama, Reza revealed what life was really like for him as a gay man. Reza’s openness about his sexuality on the show sent a message of support to fans who also came from a similar cultural background. At the time, Reza noted he felt a responsibility to young Middle Eastern youth. For this alone, the man deserves a spot on the Mount Rushmore of Bravo since it was a hard story to tell.
Lisa Vanderpump – Vanderpump Rules
Lisa Vanderpump is an icon. She single-handedly started the Real Housewives of Beverly Hills and then produced another successful series on Bravo, Vanderpump Rules. Not only did she manage to create drama from the scuffles due to her SUR, but she also got America hooked on goat cheese balls. Lisa is one of a kind. The woman owns swans, a rose-themed villa, and even ponies that could sometimes be mistaken for unicorns, thanks to all the glitter in their manes. When it came to Lisa, she always had that stiff upper lip and refused to do anything but keep calm and carry on.
I’d argue that Lisa is the only Bravo star with the Midas touch. Everything the restaurateur touches turns to gold. Lisa isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but the Real Housewives star does a lot of good. She is an avid animal lover, LGBTQ+ ally, and an entrepreneur. She is open about her experience with adoption and walks the walk. Due to all this, she might be the first face carved so no one can block her good side.
Kyle Cooke – Summer House
There is only one reason Kyle Cooke is making this list, and that is due to his undying love of America. And the mullet. We can’t forget the mullet. I am very aware I am going to have to look over Kyle’s misdeeds, which have included cheating and gaslighting his wife. Kyle is the American Dream. He made Loverboy into a company that just did $38 million in sales. Kyle had a lightbulb moment after everyone kept asking him what he was drinking on the show. After hawking other brands for so long, he decided to create a one-of-a-kind, health-conscious alcohol product. Now, he is laughing all the way to the bank.
Kyle isn’t just a pretty face (which will help attract tourists.) He is smart, too. The New Yorker single-handedly invented the Bravo payscale. While on the Trading Secrets podcast, Kyle revealed that he ran point on the negotiations between the cast and Bravo. His idea was a cast member gets paid more the longer you’re on the show. Kyle noted, “If you join season 3 or season 6, you’re making what we all made in our first season.” So the OGs are making the most money while the newbies start at the OG’s Season 1 salary. So Kyle can throw a great July Fourth bash and talk with the big boys? He’s on our mountain, for sure.
Teresa Giudice – Real Housewives of New Jersey
I have to show respect to the woman who literally put the Real Housewives on the map and left meatball stains on the rug of a fine dining establishment. Teresa Giudice has single-handedly made Bravo a household name. To this day, I can’t go a week without letting a Treism slip out of my mouth (Hekyll and Jive still kills me.) Teresa has shared every moment of her life with viewers for the last 14 years. The Real Housewives of New Jersey cameras have caught her flipping tables, giving birth, going to jail, losing her parents, getting divorced, falling out with her brother, and remarrying. Not many other Bravo stars have given fans that much material to work with.
But Teresa has always delivered. If it were up to me, Tre’s face would go smack dab in the middle of the rock art, complete with her original widow’s peak, just for old-time’s sake. And if we are getting really creative, we can add an interactive audio section that has Tre yelling “Joe!” all through the land.
TELL US – WHO WOULD YOU WANT TO SEE ON BRAVO’S VERSION OF MOUNT RUSHMORE?
