“Later this season on Summer House,” Tom Schwartz stops by wearing angel wings. Okay. Kyle Cooke and Amanda Batula discuss whether they should have kids.
Meanwhile, as Lexi Wood and Jesse Solomon are still trying to figure out the nature of their relationship, Paige DeSorbo is considering ending hers with Craig Conover.
Finally, free from the jealous rages of his ex, Lindsay Hubbard, Carl Radke admits to Ciara Miller, “I kind of have a crush on you.” Didn’t see that coming. I don’t think Ciara did either, since her eyes widen with shock.
Watch the Summer House midseason trailer for Season 9 below
Lindsay tells her doctor, “I’m terrified of this labor.”
“You’re not gonna feel anything,” her doctor assures her, “even if you tear.”
“Or sh*t yourself,” Danielle Olivera laughs.
Back at the house, Kyle’s still wearing his sloth costume, as he talks to Schwartz. “I never would have thought I would not have kids by now,” he says. Kyle’s 42, and he and Amanda are still wondering when would be the best time to start their family.
“There’s some days I’m, like, should I even have kids?” Amanda tells Kyle over dinner. “I’m not suited to take care of something else.” Really? You’ve been taking care of Kyle for 10 years. Plus you have two dogs you’ve managed to keep alive. You seem perfectly capable.
Since Lexi was away the previous weekend, the girls fill her in on what she missed. “Jesse got his toe sucked?!” she gasps. She’d better get that confirmed with her sort-of-boyfriend/crush.
“You’re making it seem like I’m some crazy, jealous girl,” she confronts Jesse, “when you let a random girl suck your toe.” At least it was only his toe, Lex. Look at the bright side.
Summer House Season 9 midseason trailer teases breakups and hookups
In the girls’ room, Paige seems to be having doubts about her relationship, too. “No one’s going to hate you if you do what’s best for you,” Ciara counsels. Craig might, though.
“I’m just nervous,” Paige admits. “Craig’s going to be, like, you’re such a f*cking bitch.” Yup, he’s not going to take it well, but that’s probably a sign that she’s doing the right thing. We’ve seen Paige grow up a lot over the years, while Craig just gets crankier and stuck in his tinfoil conspiracies. He also has trouble getting along with other people, likes to stir the sh*t and is just a wee bit controlling. You can do better, Paige.
Season 9 newbie is Imrul Hassan is proving to be a real playboy. He’s brought home a different girl nearly every night since he’s been in the house. Ciara’s had enough of it. “Do you bring home girls like this in your own home?” she asks him. “Cause it’s obnoxious at this point.” Imrul seems taken aback.
Again, Paige is venting to the girls about Craig. “He says to me, ‘I really wish you didn’t do this before you saw the ring,'” she says.
“What?!” Ciara responds, as Lindsay shakes her head.
“In my head, I was, like, this is why we’re breaking up,” Paige continues. “Because I don’t know if you’re lying right now.” And there you have it. Finally, we’re getting some answers to what happened to Bravo’s favorite couple.
And that’s what we have to look forward to this season on Summer House.
Summer House airs Wednesdays at 9/8c on Bravo.
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