Teen Mom's Farrah Abraham Blogs About Her DUI Experience

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Farrah Abraham is celebrating Easter today with her family. And I really hope she takes the time to count her blessings, love (and appreciate) her family, and reflect on her mistakes. (Keep reading for a few adorable pictures of Sophia!)

Who am I kidding? Farrah is an insufferable brat who takes her blessings for granted, treats her family like crap, and never takes responsibility for mistakes.

The Teem Mom star took to Twitter to ~~explain~~ bitch about her recent DWI/DUI incident. The title of Farrah's blog is WHAT REALLY HAPPENED By ME – ya know the person who was really there! HAHA. You already know this is going to be ~~good~~ a train wreck.

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Warning: Farrah's blog is long and painful to read. Sadly, I do not think the blog is a result of WWI, writing while intoxicated, but rather she is just … I'm going to let Reality Tea's incredibly witty readers fill in that blank. 😉 I wish I could aptly summarize it for you all. However, Farrah's writing really needs to be experienced in its raw form, and I fear I wouldn't be able to do it justice.

Farrah Blames DUI On Her Sister; Celebrity Arrests Are Funny

Farrah started her self-righteous rant by dissing her fans and haters for reading the "dramatic reporters regurgitated instigations" surrounding her DWI.

I’m assuming most of you have read every other dramatic interpreted version of what possibly happened regarding my DWI incident. That’s totally fine that you read every construed version of what really happened and then made judgments that were false per that incident. Now that the dust has settled and maybe you noticed there was no mug shot, no one got injured, no cars were totaled, and I received no felony charges maybe your ready to read what simply happened rather then regard to the over sensationalized, dramatic reporters regurgitated instigations… ya I know sometimes others make the wrong judgments.

So, now that we're all ready to read Farrah's side of the story, she has decided to gift us this blog. Farrah explained that she was out on the night of St. Patrick's day "like everyone else who is 21 years of age or older" and she was "put in the position" of being the designated driver. Clearly, the person to blame here is the one who failed to inform Farrah that the designated driver isn't supposed to sip on drinks all night long. /sarcasm

So I know myself and I had not drank to the extent to be negligent (if you do not know what this word means regarding drinking to much please look it up) as well I am certified to sale alcohol and bartend so I am very cautious and responsible regarding just a night out with drinking and not to mention my daughter’s father died because of drinking and drugs in a car accident and being with the wrong people. So Me, Myself, I think about what I do, what my actions will do to myself and others.

At that point, Farrah got in her car, drove around a corner, and re-parked her car. According to the original report, Farrah nearly took out a cop car during her short trip around the corner.

I was by no way or shape deserving of a cop walking over to my Parked car. When I told him what I was worried about which was “Finding my family member and now I can’t see her” he immediately demanded all the regular documentation, and wanted to just put me in the back of the cop car. Hint: NO SOBRIETY TEST, and No care of what I’m worried about, he does not let my friend just take me home in my friends car and by this point I’m pissed. So I just say fine take me to the station for no reason!

Farrah said that the "asswhole" cop continued to "press her buttons" and "piss her off" because he did not explain how to use the breathalyzer, failed to take into account Farrah's sinus illness, and accused her of refusing the test.

I quit talking to this cop because he clearly has no idea what the f**k he’s doing and now probably can’t wait to release a asswhole cop report to the media (WHICH HE DID, so stellar specially about a reality star) then I have a second cop give me a normal real breathalyzer test, he stats how to hold your breathe and handle the breathalyzer (THANK GOD 1 normal person all night). When the alcohol content is shown, which I did not see personally, it was .145. That is a number of legal intoxication, no doubt, but like I mentioned I know how to handle myself and I was concerned about safety. So I was released and the asswhole cop who kept trying to make everything worse for myself was shouting loudly 'I’m shocked she only blew that, she should be in jail'- ya what a dumbass.

According to Farrah, that is "practically the story" and the other details are "unneeded history" but she wanted to leave her fans with a few words of advice. (advice = nonsensical run-on sentences about being 21 years old)

I want you to know fans, to learn from my small accident, and make sure if your ever in this situation to know your not the first 21 year old to have your 1st DWI or DUI, handle your self with respect even when the cop disrespects you, make sure to seek a lawyer, and have your boundaries set to your family and friends, and stay on track to your aspirations and even though your family isn’t there to help, the media reports have outlandish claims, your car gets toed, your stuck with out your keys, you now have to pay fines, and the world in general feels against you. Know like your girl Farrah right here ☺ stay positive because you know what really happened, and her personally and physically ok, you can take care of your responsibilities, and you will achieve all your goals and it just may take a little extra time, live your life and know 21 is a tough year (your not a child, and others won’t under stand but unfortunately 21 is the year to understand the good and bad and live life and come out a positive, better, hardworking, knowledgeable person!

TELL US – GOODNESS! HOW DID FARRAH GRADUATE HIGH SCHOOL!? DO YOU THINK FARRAH WAS MISTREATED BECAUSE OF HER REALITY STAR STATUS? (HAHA) WILL FARRAH EVER BECOME THE ADULT THAT SHE THINKS SHE IS?