Mob Wives Chicago Recap: A Lot of Talking, But Not A Lot to Say

We resume with our favorite Mob Wives: Chicago ladies with Christina Scoleri‘s party going to heck in a hand basket.  After all, NoraNora Schweihs did just accuse Renee Fecarotta Russo‘s dad of raping her.  Pia Rizza is just thrilled that finally the other ladies are seeing the Nora that she sees.

Nora is crying to the point that her make-up is running so she makes a quick exit.  Renee is quoting Forest GumpChristina can’t believe that none of the women are even slightly siding with Nora.  Has she watched any of the episodes?

Pia decides to hash out the party antics with her fifteen-year-old daughter.  Pia wants her daughter to hear their crazy family history before she hears it on the mean streets..or at school.  Bella is very mature, but she sure didn’t need to hear that her mom punched someone in the face.  Just let this poor girl navigate high school sans the drama!  Pia is doing an ugly cry, but her daughter is a stellar and mature fixture.  Should she get her own show?

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Christina is meeting Nora for lunch to make sure she survived the party.  Nora is sporting quite the shiner.  When did that happen?  I didn’t realize the fight was so intense.  Nora thinks that Pia and Renee premeditated their ambush…even though they hate each other and can’t speak to one another without spitting venom.  Christina feels sorry for Nora.  While she doesn’t think that Pia and Renee were in cahoots prior to the party, she feels badly that they ganged up on her friend.

Renee meets with her little brother Frankie.  I feel like she may be putting out a hit on Nora during this conversation.  Her brother has been an extra in every mobster movie I’ve ever seen.  Is that a Member’s Only jacket?  No…it’s plastic.  Renee sobs as she tells her younger brother that Nora accused their dad of raping her.  Frankie’s veins are popping, and he wants to know if Renee wants him to “contact” Nora.  Does “contact” translate to broken knee caps?

Leah Disimone heads to Christina’s house to give her a pedicure.  Christina reveals to Leah that she’s seen Nora, and that Nora has a black eye.  She cries talking about Nora’s bruises, and she feels responsible for the entire debacle.  Leah tries to be the voice of reason.  She reminds Christina of all the awful things that Nora has said about their friends.  She even brings up the hateful thing Nora said about Renee and her father.  Christina thinks that Nora throws punches with her mouth, while the other girls throw punches with their..well, fists.

Christina wants to meet with Pia to find out why she ganged up on Nora.  Christina is defensive when Pia reminds her that she was the one who pushed for a reconciliation between the ladies.  Christina is appalled at Nora’s beat down, but Pia is disgusted that Nora accused her of exchanging sexual favors for money.  The women are clearly at an impasse.

Nora meets up with her new BFF Desiree who looks like she could be Nora’s daughter.  Nora is thrilled that her face is healing so well.  She relays the fight, and of course Desiree is on her side.  Nora decides to focus on the tasting for the wine that will be her father’s greatest tribute.

Christina meets Renee for dinner to get her side of the story.  Leah joins the ladies, and she’s clearly Team Renee.  When Christina admits to meeting with Nora, both Renee and Leah are floored that Christina feels sorry for her.  There is a good two minutes of Renee being bleeped out in regard to what Nora said about Renee’s dad.  Renee relives all the past situations where Nora has been a complete B while Christina defends her friend who has no more friends left.  Renee is shocked by Christina’s revelation, but she knows that soon enough Christina will feel Nora’s wrath of craziness.  AKA, they will all learn each others’ insanity!

Pia is shopping with her friend and co-worker Kamila.  Pia is shopping for lingerie…but her lingerie is flannel pajama pants.  Pia admits that she’s ready to quit dancing to spare her daughter from the social awkwardness of having her mom being  a stripper.  Pia also reveals that, even though she and Renee are on the same page when it comes to Nora, Renee still needs to apologize for talking smack about Pia’s dancing…on a pole.

Leah and Christina head to lunch where Leah chastises Christina for thinking it’s alright for implying that Renee’s father molested her.  In Leah’s opinion, regardless of whether what Nora said was true, it was a terrible thing to say.  Leah believes she deserved the black eye.  Christina hopes that Leah will join her and Nora for drinks.  Maybe she will change her opinion.

Pia and Renee meet up to rehash their differences.  Renee apologizes for judging Pia’s job.  Of course, she follows that up by judging Pia’s job some more.  Renee wonders why Pia hasn’t hung up her g-string.  Pia says that she’s quit dancing.  That was quick!  Meanwhile Nora tastes her new wine and feels as if her wine’s namesake is running through her veins.  Not creepy at all…She knows her wine is extremely upscale, so she’s planning on charging upwards of $15.99 a bottle.  Heck, I can afford that!

Christina and Pia meet for lunch, and Christina accuses her friend of not feeling badly for hitting Nora at her party.  Christina is shocked that Pia can mend fences with Renee while still being ugly to Nora.  Pia shares with Christina that she’s quitting the club, and Christina calls her out for hanging up her pasties because Renee is judging her.  Christina organizes a meeting between Leah and Nora.  She hopes that Leah will feel badly for Nora.  When Leah tries to say that she was disgusted with what Nora said about Renee’s dad, Nora counters with the fact she thinks she was speaking the truth.  Christina tries to mediate, and Nora pulls up cell phone pictures of her post-brawl eye injury.  Leah has turned the page…she is now team Nora after seeing her pics.  Christina now turns the dinner into an anti-Pia lunch.  Is she serious?

Next week, Renee isn’t thrilled that her daughter is going to visit her dad in jail.  Nora continues her quest to exhume her father’s body, and the women continue to bicker.

TELL US-WHAT DID YOU THINK OF LAST NIGHT’S EPISODE?  ARE ANY OF THESE LADIES RELIABLE?

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